Have I got a deal for you! Right here in Columbus, Ohio, just a stone’s throw and then some from the home of the Buckeyes, stands the retail space pictured above. Now, I know you’re thinking that it doesn’t look like anything special, but I ask you to acknowledge that appearances can be deceiving, and hear me out. By the time I’m done, you’ll be begging to sign the lease before someone else does. The property in question is situated within a modern strip mall at one of our fine city’s busier intersections. It rubs shoulders with a financial institution on one side and a haircut shop on the other, with plenty of respectable businesses filling out the corner, from a bakery to an excellent Chinese buffet. Even if you’re giving me the benefit of the doubt at this moment, you’re probably wondering about dull things like square footage and how many dollars per month. Trust me, those are petty concerns. After I’ve finished, you’ll realize that any amount of capital is a worthy investment for this gem of an opportunity.
Remember that dream you had, the one that people thought was so crazy that you stopped telling people about it? You were going to be a pioneer, a daring entrepreneur with the right amounts of pop culture knowledge and chutzpah to pull off something that hasn’t been done before. It’s all coming back to you now, right? You were going to open a Brady Bunch Store, the very first of its kind. They laughed at you when you went looking for investors. But you kept on keeping on, spreading the word about a retail space filled with vintage Brady toys, modern collectibles, autographed photos, every marketable scrap of Bunch merchandise gathered under one reverent roof. There would be celebrity appearances, Friday night screenings in the auditorium, and guided tours through the adjacent Brady Bunch Museum. Your banker told you that you were crazy, claimed that you couldn’t put a such cockeyed business proposal in the black even if you had ten years to try. And you, a dreamer defeated, believed the haters and accepted that your destiny was impossible.
Well now, my friend, it’s time to bring your dream alive again. If ever destiny has demanded a Brady storefront, it has done so at this very place in Ohio’s capitol. For you see, the busy corner upon which this property rests is no ordinary intersection. It is the very Brady-est of all.
As Jan once said, “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!” So we echo in the realty business, “location, location, location!”
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Jonathan S
on Feb. 5th, 2008
Kismet! Perhaps it could be a butcher shop. The kids always liked going to the butcher shop and what this country needs more of these days? Meat. Lots of meat.
TheMrs
on Feb. 6th, 2008
Bob,
I believe you could sell ketchup popsicles to a lady wearing white gloves!
Sorry, but I’m all outta checks.
Zeal PR
on Feb. 6th, 2008
I’ve spent the past 16 months working with “A Christmas Story” House here in Cleveland. People were skeptical but it’s worked. I don’t know if you’re serious or not — but if you are, good luck!!!
Bob Hunt
on Feb. 6th, 2008
Mmm…ketchup popsicles. That does sound tempting.
Bob Hunt
on Feb. 6th, 2008
Zeal PR — It’s more along the lines of wishful thinking (that is, wishing that someone else would do it so I can simply enjoy it!). I mean, Reed and Henderson, for goodness sake! You won’t find that everywhere. And sure, other possible intersections could be amusing (say, Williams and McCormick), but nothing tops the meeting of this lady and this fellow. God wants something Brady here, surely.
Good luck on the ACS house. Haven’t been up there yet, but I’ve heard good things.
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